Things I Am Annoyed About Right Now

-The sheer amount of laundry I need to be doing-there is some in the dryer to be folded, some in the washer to be dried, some on the kitchen floor to be washed, and some clean hanging out on some dining room chairs to be put away....it's endless and it's stalking me.

-My bikini line itches-I dry shaved it quickly before going to the pool on Sat. MISTAKE!

-The kitchen sink is full of dishes to be washed-everytime I wash a sink full and turn my back three more dirty dishes appear. It's magic. Magic crap.

-Someone just called me and didn't leave a message. Yeah I admit I screen my calls. I don't usually like to talk to anyone before noon.

-My daughter, thanks to my Mother, has now discovered the joys of kid websites and wants to play on the computer all the time. Noggin, PbsKids, Nick Jr and Discovery Kids have stolen my daughter's imagination. Well it's not all bad, I did get to read Cosmo uninterrupted this morning.

-The pounding, pounding, POUNDING of my neighbor's rebuilding their garage roof for three days now. My husband and I joked yesterday that our lazy butts could never commit to a home improvement project for three days. If it can't be done in under an hour, it aint gettin done!

-I am getting on a plane this week and inevitably everytime I am scheduled to fly somewhere there is a plane crash. Did you hear about those 49 people in Kentucky? Two of them were newlyweds. Just sad sad.

-I am waiting for an email from someone and they haven't emailed be back.

-It's raining.

-My roots need to be done...again.

-All my bras are worn out.

-My baby is taking a long morning nap which means that she will take a late afternoon nap pushing bedtime back to 8pm, when her older sister goes to bed at 7pm.

-I need to go pick up a certified letter at the post office and I am sure I won't remember.

-My hand hurts again, and I am probably going to need surgery.

-My coffee is cold and I can't warm it in the microwave because it will wake light-sleeping baby

-I am annoyed with myself because I have spent 10 minutes writing about all these annoying things when I should be cleaning. Oh well.

*Beauty Tip* Check out this fantasic website Glam.com! It has up to the minute beauty and style tips, as well as celebrity features like "Get The Look" and how to duplicate your favorite celebrity beauty. My favorite section is "Expert Q & A" because you can't go wrong with advise from such makeup greats as Bobbi Brown and Pat McGrath!

Monster Fridays-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Yea! It's Friday! I really have no reason to look forward to Fridays. Why is that?

Well, I am a stay at home Mom so it's not like I have a job during the week and I get weekends off. As a Mom I am always on duty. I am happy it's almost Friday night though because it's date night. I roped my in-laws into babysitting tonight so that my husband and I can meet some friends out on the town. My in-laws totally owe us, they have been on vacation for three weeks. We don't get out much, it's very exciting when we do. Plus it's been a long week with the kids. And I don't know what it is about Fridays but my four year old is just a monster. I call it "Monster Fridays" because she is always a monster crab at the end of the week. Tomorrow she'll be fine, but today--WATCHOUT>tantrums, whining, and not sharing are the norm on a Friday. The rest of the week she is usually her pleasant old self.

I don't get it. But I can't wait til her grandparents come over and I can flee the house. I wonder if other Moms feel like this at the end of the day. I wonder if when I was a kid, did my parents feel that way about my little brother and I? Is that why they left us with so many babysitters? I really didn't like them much. I think that's why I don't hire babysitters for my kids, instead I unfairly count on my in-laws to help out. Plus it's free. And free babysitting for my little "monsters" is the way to go!

*Beauty Tip* If you are getting ready for a big night out and don't have time to re-wash your hair, or you had to give your sand covered children a bath and there is no hot water left then here is a little trick. This works for curly or wavy hair. Spray some water, spray gel, or protein spray on it. Pile it up on top of your head in a messy buns, secure it with bobby pins and let air dry or blast it for a minute with the blowdrier. Let it sit while you do your makeup and then undo it and let the sexy messy wavys fall where they may. Hot date hair! For a great protein spray try Fredric Fekkai or Oscar Blandi at Sephora.com

The Question.

Yesterday as we were getting home from a trip to the pool, my four year old poses this question for me. Out of the blue. Right as we are pulling into the driveway.

"Mom, how do babies come out of their mother's tummies?"

Yikes! How can I really answer a question like that when we are right in the driveway getting ready to go into the house? The answer is I didn't. I told her that I didn't know and I would have to get back to her. Ha. She didn't buy it though. She's like, "yes you do, just tell me real quick." Smart kid.

I still didn't get into it with her. It was 5:00 approaching dinnertime, I had to get her and her baby sister in the bath after the pool so there was no way I was going to explain how babies were born at that exact moment. I wonder when she will bring it up again.

*Beauty Tip* Instead of a tip today, I have a question for all the Moms out there...How many of you wore makeup in the delivery room?

Big Needle In My Hand--Smile!

I hardly ever take my two young children with me to doctors appointments. I had no choice today though because my mother-in-law was out of town. Taking two little kids to the doctor is not fun.

I had to see the hand doctor because of mysterious swollen tendons in my hand. Nothing has been working to fix this problem. So today I thought the Doctor would just want to discuss hand surgery with me. No big deal if I bring my two kids with me right? Wrong! He casually mentions that he can give me an injection in my hand. An injection? My four year old wasn't fooled. She looked at me with really big wide eyes and said, "Mom are you going to have to get a shot in your hand?" Yikes. Shots are like the biggest baddest word ever to a little kid. Especially to my daughter, who has seen her little baby sister get a shot once and was slightly tramatized by it.
Plus the Hand Doctor said that shots in the hand hurt. Alot. Thanks Doc, for saying that in front of my kid. I tried to tell her it was no big deal, but she looked at me and said, "I think I am getting a little nervous now." And she wasn't even the one getting the big needle stuck in her hand. She was nervous for me! I was nervous for me too! Part of me felt that it might be a good thing for her to see me get a shot because I could show her that it really wasn't so bad.
All I can say is thank goodness for my high threshold for PAIN. Because let me tell you this shot hurt like hell and I wanted to scream bloody murder, but instead I managed to smile a huge smile, look at my daughter and LIE. "It doesn't hurt a bit," I told her through the enormous mind numbing pain that was being inflicted on my hand. Not just a quick pin prick either, the Hand Doc kept the needle in there for awhile and then moved my ring finger all around so the injection would spread through my whole hand. My 16-month-old even had her hands over her face as if to say,"holy shit Mom that is a huge needle!" The Hand Doc told my kids that they have a "tough Mom." No kidding.

Hopefully next summer when my daughter turns five and goes in to get her shots before kindergarten she will remember how brave her Mom was when I got a big huge needle stuck into my hand. Somehow I doubt it though.

*Beauty Tip* I really could use a day at a spa. My hand hurts to much to type out a beauty tip. No manicures for me today. Instead of a manicure I will just put on a litte of Neutrogena's Instant Nail Enhancer($7). This colorless liquid adds instant shine and polish to your nails. Maybe if my nails look better no one will notice the Dora the Explorer Bandaid on the palm of my hand.

The Shirtless Matthews

Check out this picture of Matt Lauer! It makes me blush and giggle like a teenage girl.
Who knew that Matt Lauer was so WICKED HOT!!

As a grown women with two young children keeping me very busy, I don't usually get too excited over seeing pictures of shirtless men, but this one is seriously WICKED HOT!! Maybe it's because I see Matt Lauer everyday on the Today Show that I find this picture of his six pack abs very reavealing. He is kind of cute in a dorky newscaster way. Come to think of it there are alot of pictures lately of a shirtless Matthew McConahey. Those pictures of him rank up there as WICKED HOT too. I don't think he has gone anywhere lately with his shirt on. Fine by me. Thank you for the blush "shirtless Matthews."

*Beauty Tip* Even if your abs aren't the six pack that Matt Lauer's are, there is a simple way to look slimmer. Self tanner! Self tanner can give the illusion of slimness and disguise veins and stretch marks. Lancome and Clarins make great high end self tanners, but you can also check out some great ones at your local drugstore by Loreal and Neutrogena. My self tanner of choice this summer was Neutrogena's Instant Bronze.

Smug Mom Moment--Hooray For Me

My two daughters and I just got back from a long walk to the ice cream shoppe. It's a really great old fashioned ice cream shoppe that my four year old obviously loves to go to. She would go there everyday if she could. I just like that it seems more old fashioned if I spell shop like shoppe. Anyway two great moments occurred there. The first being that I convinced my daughter to just have a scoop of cookies and cream ice cream at $1.75 instead of the obscenely expensive sundae with rainbow sprinkles, hot fudge, and whipped cream at $4.00. Hooray for bargain ice cream. Now the second great thing that happened is that there was a table next to us with two young girls who were 3 and 4. They kept coming over to our table to chat with my girls. Now I didn't mind obviously, but I realized there was no way in hell I would let my girls go up and bug other people at a table in a restaurant. Their Mom had to keep coming over and dragging them back to their own table. Five or Six times at least. So I felt rather smug about my own two very well behaved children sitting politely waiting patiently for their ice cream. Hooray for my superior parenting skills, right? Oh and the kicker was this poor Mom was pregnant too with her third. Sucka!

Oh I totally know that tomorrow I will probably get mine too. Maybe double tantrums somewhere very public complete with kicking and screaming and rolling around on the floor, while someother smug Mom looks at me thinking that she has it made with her own well behaved kids.

*Beauty Tip* I have to say that I own about a million lipsticks, glosses, and balms. Each one runs the price range gamet from cheap to really stupid expensive for lipstick, hello Chanel:) Anyway I got a great new cheapie lipgloss and I love it. The color is perfect and the staying power is impressive. So I guess expensive isn't always better. I guess this is less of a beauty tip and more like something to ponder about beauty. I will investigate this cheapie vs. expensive concept and get back to you.

Justin Timberlake Please Bring My Sexy Back!

Have you heard the new Justin Timberlake song-"Sexy Back"? I think you can listen to it for free at www.justintimberlake.com. I have to say that the first time I heard it I was was like WHAT? It was very electronic, but with very little singing on his part. After I heard it a few more times, I have to say the song is engrained in my brain. I can't stop singing it and hearing the beat in my head. But the question is as a stay-at-home Mom, what can I do as the songs says to "bring my sexy back?" Children seems to suck the life out of me during the day so by the time nighttime with my husband rolls around, I have nothing left to give. No sexy, no nothing. Just let me read my magazine!

It's been a rough couple of days. Yesterday was a real doozy with the the awful gum spliting incident. Read yesterdays blog if you want to know those gruesome details. Plus my oldest took a bite out of her younger sister's hand. Well just little teeth marks really.

Today needs to improve. My youngest is already napping, which is a bad sign. It's too early and guarantees that she will need another nap around four, and then she won't be tired for bed until 9. Blah. I need to summon up some serious energy to do something fun with the girls today. Maybe the pool, but I am not sure I want to tackle that since my youngest thinks she can swim and insists on throwing herself under the water repeatedly forcing me to pick her up chocking and sputtering to set her back on her little baby feet.

Here is my fantasy for today...it's a sexy one. Maybe Mary Poppins will magically show up at my door, entertain my girls all day, make them healthy great meals, and put them to bed while I curl up on the couch, read a book all day, or go to a spa for a massage, manicure, pedicure, hot salt scrub, and hair cut. Great fantasy right?

*Beauty Tip* If you are in need of a great massage because your shoulders are sore from carrying around two little children all day, but can't afford the luxury of a spa, then check out the pricing of some acredited massage schools in your area. Most massage students need to complete a certain number of training hours and practice on people for a small fee. Usually around $20-30 which is a lot cheaper then the $60-100 price tag of a massage at a spa.

The Firemen Story

As I sit down to write this I have been interupted three times already by my children. The first time my oldest wanted more "crunchy cereal" otherwise known as the new Dora cereal. It's supposed to have some good whole grains in it, but who knows! It's probably just good old fashioned sugar cereal. I'm not fooled. The second time my youngest dropped her bagel on the floor, and the third time she dropped her bagel on the floor again. She is only one year old, and everytime she drops it I see little flashes of baby anger as she makes tiny fists and waves her arms in the air. As if she is saying, "GET MY BAGEL BACK NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"So now I don't even remember what I was going to write about at this point. Oh I know, I just looked at the title again. The Firemen Story. This is a good one. My oldest just turned four years old. She is very intelligent and advanced for her age, like I am sure your kids are too. Doesn't every parent think their kid is super smart? I could really gush about her for pages and pages, but I don't want to be one of those parents. They make me want to puke. So one day last week we were riding in the car and my four year old asks as we pass a new building in town what that building is used for. So I tell her in my very best grown up explaining voice--"it's the firehouse, where the firemen wait until they go and help with a fire or rescue." She then tells me," Mom don't forget about the fireladies, you must remember them too!" My little pint sized feminist!

Here are some other random things my four year old has said lately.

We were in line at Target to buy her a ballerina Barbie Doll. My daughter looked at the doll held her high in the air and yelled, "Hey Mom, my doll has big boobs just like you do!"

Walking through the mall we passed two ladies and my daughter said, "Hey Mom those ladies have dark faces!" So I explained to her that those ladies were African-American. PC, right? I told my husband about this later and he asked me why didn't I just tell her that different people have different colored skin. I guess that might have made more sense to her.

*Beauty Tip* Did you know that 80% of aging is environmental, aka sun damage? The best thing you can do for the future of your skin is to wear a daily moisturizer with a SPF 15 or 30. Everyday. Go check your moisturizer now and if it doesn't have an SPF, go get one! Your wrinkle free skin will thank you for it. Neutrogena makes a great one called "Daily Defense"($10) and Prescriptives makes one that is my personal favorite called "All You Need SPF 15"($40)

Buy My House Couple #86 PLEASE!!!

We have been trying to sell our house now for 6 months. It's not like we are getting transferred anywhere and have to move, but since this is our little starter house we are running out of space. Well to be more precise, my husband needs more space. He has a load of collectible crap, skateboards, and music stuff that needs a home somewhere. Like in a basement. Which we don't have right now. Unfortunately it seems like everything in the world is for sale right now and buyer have too much to choose from. We have had a ton of lookers but no buyers. The biggest problem is that we don't have a basement and our yard sucks. Oh well.

So a nice young couple came over this morning to look. I will call them "Couple #86" because that is at least how many times I have had to clean up the house for lookers. So 86 seemed like a couple looking for a starter home in a great neighborhood. I could totally picture them living in my house. Hopefully they could picture themselves living in my house. My two girls and I were supposed to be out of the house when they came, but they were late so we were back. I hate being here when people are looking, they say that lookers can't really look unless the seller isn't home. Oh well, they should have been on time. There is only so much time I can spend wandering around town aimlessly with a 4-year-old and a 1-year-old. At least the girls hadn't torn up the house again before the lookers came through. It happens quick you know. One minute your house is a picture of order and the next minute you are tripping over "my little ponies" and soggy crusts of bread litter the floor.

You wouldn't believe all the crazy cleanup I have to do in order to get the house presentable for a showing. Like hiding our laundry and putting our disgrace under the sink. Here is a list of other things that must be done.
1. Carry laundry out to the car.
2. Put highchair in the garage.
3. Tie Back shower curtain.
4. Pick up bathroom towels(there are usually at least 3 on the floor).
5. Wipe down gross water that collects on bathroom sink.
6 Open all the blinds(11 sets).
7. Open Curtains upstairs.
8. Make beds, pick up girls rooms, put away their fans and binkies.
9. Pick up all toys and throw on our all season porch.
10. Straiten toys on all season porch because otherwise it looks like a tornado went through.
11. Dustbust all of my stray hair that seems to be everywhere. I am worst then a dog.

This is just small sample of things that I must to do get the house ready. And this does not take into account if I have dishes in the sink or laundry to be folded on my dining room table! Blah! The whole thing is really getting on my nerves at this point. Honestly it would be better if it didn't sell. We can't really afford to move anyway!

Yet I still kind of want to. A better yard for the girls to play in would be nice. My oldest is dying for a swing set and knows that in the new house we would probably talk Gramma and Granpa into buying one. Actually it would be their idea. They are full on into the spoiling the grandchildren with anything and everything they want. My daughter on a daily basis asks me for new things when we get the new house. It goes like this...
"Mom, can I have a pony and a fairy princess castle in the new house?"
I always say "sure." Because obviously I don't really think our house is going to sell, so what's a few empty promises?

But maybe, just maybe, Couple #86 will come through for us. I am pinning all my hopes on them. Or maybe they will buy one of the other 8 million starter homes for sale in our neighboorhood. Keep your fingers crossed for us!